Wheels Fallen Off Poem

By Sue Ellson

 

I feel as if
The wheels have fallen off
The car that is
My life

 

All at once
So many things
Have gotten me in
To strife

 

First this
And then that
Then something else
Caught in combat

 

So once again
I stop, I pause
I dig a little deeper
To understand the cause

 

A lifetime of trauma
Rises to the surface
And there I am
In the fire of the furnace

 

At the point of combustion
A spark, a flame
It bursts the seed
To rise again

 

A glimmer of hope
A kind word or two
Then all of a sudden
I see a way through

 

As I reflect
On the chaos combined
The multiplier effect
Had set me behind

 

But then I realised
Slowly but surely
I still had the car
Even though the wheels were wonky

 

One by one
I fixed those wheels
And got back to the place
Of peaceful feels

 

So next time this happens
I’ll imagine a flat tyre
I’ll go ahead and fix it
Not sink in the mire

 

It was simply a pothole
On a dilapidated road
But that won’t stop me
Or make me explode

 

It was time for maintenance
A time for me to see
A way to gaze wider
And truly be me

 

At the beginning of this month, several significant challenges presented themselves all at once. I literally felt as if my whole life and how I live my life, was completely wrong and I was grasping for solutions that would somehow fix everything at once. I contemplated some very significant changes, but I knew I was in a state of confusion. I also know that it is never a good idea to make a major decision in a moment of overwhelming stress. Fortunately, I was able to talk to some trusted confidantes and make one small decision after another and work through the issues individually.

Part of this process involved re-establishing a professional exchange with an executive coach. This involved completing an awful lot of paperwork. As I answered those questions and re-acquainted myself with the answers I provided back in 2011, I realised how my values had not changed and whilst my current circumstances are different, my overall objectives are largely the same. That helped. It made me realise I hadn’t completely lost the plot.

I have also been asked to resume a gratitude journal and answer five questions every evening and journal ‘morning pages’ every morning. That started six days ago and the myriad of thoughts I had swimming in my mind have decreased and I have gained some very interesting insights and strategies for moving forward.

So it seems that because I hadn’t been doing any ‘maintenance’ on the ‘car’ of my life, it was pretty easy to see that one day, the proverbial ‘wheels’ would fall off. Fortunately, by doing this maintenance, I have realised that I still have the car and I am probably 80% okay with most of what goes on in my life. But when several things happened all at once (and another major one this week), even that 80% okay can be tested and challenged.

Just like the person who faces a major crisis with their work, health, family, friends etc, I have had a ‘wake up call’ to make sure that I do some regular maintenance. To reflect and remember the good emotions rather than remain in survival mode remembering challenges from the past.

As another person said to me on the weekend, to focus on what I do want moving forward so that is what I attract and create. Maybe the flat tyre that has appeared needed to be fixed for a very good reason. But once it is fixed and put back on my car, the journey will continue. Then this moment of time can be put down to just a little bit of car maintenance. With love, Sue Ellson 🙂

Photo is of a car I hired when I visited Adelaide at the Adelaide Airport Car Park, South Australia, on 18 January 2021.

#WheelsFallenOff #WheelsFallenOffPoem #SueEllson #SueEllsonPoem #poem #poetry

Shared on Facebook LinkedIn Google Pinterest Twitter Instagram

See my other poems here or subscribe to the monthly email newsletter to receive links to the latest publications.